Fat, bad skin, stretch marks. Bloated, heaviest I’ve ever been, filled with fluid up to eyeballs, scarred. The first day I came home after having Rosie, I looked in the mirror as I stepped out of the shower and actually sobbed. What happened to my body? Bits of me were heading south for the summer and looked like they were never to return.
So it was the perfect time to get my photo taken right?? Probably the farthest thing from my mind, and most women’s minds when we look in the mirror and hate what we see. “I used to be so much slimmer/hotter when I was younger. Looking at myself now just depresses me, why would I want a photo of that”? Is the standard rational. (So I’m not really selling this whole ‘get your portraits’ taken thing too well am I? Well wait a minute, I’m getting there…)
So I sucked it up and did what I tell everyone else to do. I stopped hiding behind the camera and got back in front of it. I didn’t do this portrait for me. I did it for my daughter. And as it turns out, this now one of my favourite and most precious photos I have. I hope one day many years from now it will be one of Rosie’s too. I didn’t want Rosie to flip through pages of an empty photo album as I did, and question why I hardly have any photos of my parents.
So when I look at this photo I don’t see me at my worst – I see me at my best. It’s a completely different mindset. I see a beautiful image of a mother falling in love with her new little person. I see myself existing in photos for Rosie.
I am a mother, and a photographer. I am part of the “Exist in Photos” Movement. This is why I do what I do. I want you to love and exist in photos for YOUR loved ones.